If you were to ask anyone that knew me prior to meeting my husband if they could picture me living on a farm with cows, they would have ALL said heck no and most likely followed the no with a boisterous laugh. But God likes a challenge so he put me on a farm with cows in my back yard and hay in my front yard. He has a very interesting sense of humor sometimes. My husbands family raises beef cattle on a small farm in Southern Indiana. I say small because that's what I've been told but I remember my husband initially showing me the farm land, probably to impress me, years ago and it just seemed to go on forever. Anything larger than a back yard to a city girl, is HUGE. So this was huge in my mind. They have around 30 head of cattle- that's an actual farm measuring term by the way.
Now, I knew nothing about cows when I first met my husband. In fact that was the conversation at most dinners with his parents. They would quiz me on my lack of knowledge of cows and find my responses quite entertaining. Not in an overly evil way but in an, 'oh my gosh this girl really knows nothing about the farm', way. And it's true. I didn't. Let me save you some time if you find yourself in a conversation about cows and you have no clue. A cow, as referred to as such, is actually a female that has had a baby, or a calf as its called. A heifer is a female cow that has not had a baby yet. A steer is a male cow that doesn't have his, um, boy breeding parts as we'll call them. They are primarily raised for beef. A bull is a male cow that can breed, and should or he's worthless. There you go. That would've saved me countless embarrassing dinners at my in-laws.
For us, cows have 1 job basically. To become something on my dinner table. They are to breed and make future steaks. Sounds harsh but if that's how you view animals then this blog is not for you. It's the circle of life people. Go watch The Lion King.
Cows are interesting animals. They appear to be very simple grazing and eating off the land, making babies and laying in the sun. However I've learned they are tricky little stinkers. They enjoy putting their heads, or sometimes bodies, in places they shouldn't go. Ever see a cow trying to reach that perfect piece of grass just beyond the fence row? It's a sight. And it's how most fences get broken. Fixing fence on a farm is how farmers spend 70% of their time. Cows also enjoy running and jumping like crazy and it's fun to watch this massive animal move with such grace and muscle. Cows do not like being herded into a lot so they can be vaccinated and boys be castrated, which I totally get that last part. Sorry guys! I remember one time early on in my farming days when we were running cows through, again that's a farm term there, and the bull decided he wanted no part of the vaccinations and was going to exit the chute over the top. That was both terrifying and amazing to see!
Cows are also opportunists. If they think you aren't watching when you leave the gate open to the hay lot, they'll be in there munching away in no time! Just like recently when my husband put me in charge when he was out of town and we were getting our 2 new show cows for my daughter delivered. We already had 2 steers, remember those are the boys missing their parts, in the lot waiting to be shipped off to the butcher. The lot is setup that in order to get to the show barn, you have to go through the lot where the steers were. My job was to get the steers into the back lot where I could easily take a gate and shut them into the lot temporarily while the new cows were being delivered. Should've been that easy right? Well, it wasn't. There are about 3 different gates to choose from in that lot. With my blood pumping and adrenaline rushing as I easily herded the two steers by myself into that back lot as they stared at me like I was supposed to be their dinner and not the other way around, I forgot to make sure I was grabbing the correct gate. So I shut them in the lot and felt pretty accomplished by the time my mother-in-law arrived. The show cows arrived shortly after that and I didn't think anything of the two steers until my mother-in-law screamed an explicative "OH S***". About that time I realized what I'd done. I had used the wrong gate to secure the two steers in the lot and in doing so, I allowed them free access to the adjacent corn field that had been harvested a few days prior. So basically I gave them a free pass to a full buffet lunch that they realized pretty quickly. Opportunists remember? Not only did I give them their buffet lunch, but we had left the gate into that field open so the rest of our herd could roam free in there and enjoy themselves. So now I had the 2 steers in a field with 20+ other cows with an open gate to the rest of the farm. All while my husband left ME, ME of all people, in charge. Long story short, I'm a very stubborn woman when I need to be and I refuse to give up at some things. This was one of them. My mother-in-law's quick thinking somehow got the rest of the 20+ cows out of the field because they were full and bored with the corn by now, while I shut the gate behind them. That left the two steers in the massive field alone. That was better but I was so defeated. I really, really wanted to make my husband and his family proud and I did the worst thing possible. My stubbornness kicked in and I listened to my mother-in-law's advice and waited the steers out. They would eventually get full and want to come back for the water in the lot. Plus, cows are super nosy animals and we just had 2 new cows delivered they hadn't "met" yet. Oh did I mention that it was about 30 degrees out this whole time? And did I mention that of course in the middle of it all my husband called and wanted to know how things were going? I owned up to it but told him I'd handle it before he got home. I waited outside in the cold and played hide and seek for 2 hours with those lovely cheeseburgers and once they came into the lot, I shut the gate that will forever be closed, and got them back where they were supposed to be. I actually cried when I was done because I was so proud of myself even though I created the problem. I beat the cows. I won. I was the cow master! Something like that. Little did I know my father-in-law sat in his warm, heated pickup truck across the road and watched the whole thing. He did say he was proud of me however and he's a man of very few words and even fewer compliments. So I would definitely call that a win.
There will be many more posts about cows and farming and I'm sure I'll have more stories if I'm ever left in charge again. Not sure why they would ever put me in charge but I'm not here to judge.
XOXO
Ashley
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